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kflynn80

Coping in Stressful Times

I don’t think I’m going out on a limb too much to say that for many of us in 2024, it has been a bit stressful. Political differences continue to divide our country and people around the world. There is also scarcely a time when many of us get to decompress and actually step away from relentless emails or calls. Technologies have brought some of us closer together, but also contribute to feelings of not being able to let go.


Because I work in communications and read the news continually on multiple channels, I’m bombarded by terrible images and stories that are, at times, difficult to get out of your head. This morning, I read a story on a mom accidentally driving over her daughter when she dropped her at school. And the images of many places experiencing out of control wildfires were upsetting to see. Not to mention the multiple videos of a plane literally falling out of the sky in Brazil and circling straight into the ground.


On the home front, our boys are getting older with one about to become a licensed driver and another moving back to school in another state. While this is the happy progression of life, it also creates some complicated feelings for all parents. You are happy to see everyone doing well, but sad about the march of time.


Also challenging to bear for those of us in the so-called “sandwich” generation are the aging or deaths of our parents. Illnesses and the decline of once healthy and active moms and dads are difficult to watch and even harder to experience. I have lost three close relations this year – two aunts and a cousin. All were advanced in their years, but it did not make losing any of them easier. I was particularly devastated to lose my aunt, who was my godmother. I always felt like no time passed when I spoke with her. She was a wonderful person who was very loving and will be dearly missed.


Suffice it to say, all of these instances are a recipe for circumstances that can not only damage our physical well being but can also contribute mightily to poor mental health.

I am by no means an expert of how to cope. Lately, though I am listening to others and finding a few ways to deal with what life is throwing at me a bit better. I thought I would take a moment to share a few of the ways that I am doing this in case it helps others.


Taking Walks – I have been on the walking train since my dad passed away and have experienced numerous benefits. I get out and get fresh air, meet more people and move my body. Because of this, I have more muscle tone and feel relief of some of the anxiety I feel at times. Just the other day when I was feeling upset, my sister commanded me to take a walk. I dropped everything and it was the balm that was needed in a difficult day. You can start small with just a quick 15 minute walk and work up to longer outings. It truly is the gift that gives back.


More Sleep – I am a terrible sleeper. Even the smallest sound wakes me up and I need total darkness to fall into the deep rhythm needed to provide my body with relaxation. My friend Kat suggested some old fashioned CBD gummies which I tried recently and I’m pleased to say worked like a charm. Some days are better than others and its okay to resort to manufactured solutions when counting sheep doesn’t work to calm your mind.


Making Time for You – This one is really hard as my whole life revolves around my children and my mom. I socialize as often as I get the chance, but doing anything alone is rare. When John took the kids camping once, I remember feeling a deep sense of joy at being able to order take away Indian food that was hot and spicy while I watched one of my guilty pleasures on Netflix. That’s about as exciting as it gets. You can start with small things though. I like to read and to cook. Occasionally, I sit outside and let the sun beam down on me while I sit with my dog and drink a cold beverage. It’s the little things we do that sometimes add up to a lot.


Eat Healthy Foods – Most days I eat healthy foods. The days of eating pasta, pizza and BLTs are largely over except on special occasions. Now, it’s all about drinking water (I need to do more of it), eating salads and consuming vegetables and proteins. I rarely eat sweets, and when I do its usually dark chocolate covered almonds. I will happily eat Raisinets and popcorn though when I see a movie, because it would be sacrilege not to do so! I also love French pastries in a way that probably is not normal. I ask myself “is it worth it?” and usually the answer is no. The real secret is balance. I’m not so great at balance, but on this front, I sometimes get it right.


Unplug – Literally we need to unplug from our computers and phones and feel the sun on our faces or sand between our toes. There is nothing that feels better than a day without an email. I would go a step further and say a day without Teams, email, Wrike or a text message is the best day of my life.


Without a doubt though, the most important thing any of us can do is to be with our friends or family – the people who love and sustain us. I’m blessed with too many from both categories to count. They help relieve the pressures, support us when we are down, and sometimes spoil us when we need it. Having a good partner too is incredibly vital. Earlier today when I was cursing that my water had been stolen by someone in my house, I looked in the fridge and discovered it had been placed inside ever so carefully so when I returned it would be chilled. My biggest piece of advice? Find yourself someone who makes sure you are always drinking a cold beverage.

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